Voting in Ohio–Step One:Sit on A Park Bench. Congratulations! You Now Live Here

A Federal judge in Ohio ruled on Tuesday that park benches and other locations that were not buildings could be used as addresses for homeless people so that they could vote next Tuesday. 

U.S. District Judge Edmund Sargus allowed the listing of park benches as addresses for homeless people in the settlement of a suit involving the Secretary of State for Ohio, Jennifer Bruner and the Northeast Ohio Coalition for the Homeless (Ne.O.C.H.?).  While there is little detail about how the judge came to this decision, I can only imagine his notes were filled with doodles that say I (Heart) Obama,  Obama and Sargus-TLA, and stuffed inside the docket was a folded up note that read “Barack, Harry, Nancy and Barney, meet me outside the courthouse during lunch! I can’t wait!”.  The floodgates are now open for more voter fraud in Ohio than ever before.  Buses are probably already being rented by the Obamats to take up “residency” in Ohio on election day. 

But enough of the negatives.  The upside of this ruling is that since these people are no longer homeless and “own” a piece of “property”, they must pay income tax on the assessed value of their “property”.  Tax bases across Ohio should swell as “locationally disabled” people take up residence in parks across Ohio.  Rules will obviously have to be followed, first street rules then from the legislative branches of government, on how one acquires these pieces of property and how they will in turn be able to sell them.  I’m thinking squatters rights apply initially, at least until after Nov 4.  In addition to this the housing market should see a significant upswing in the state in the months of October and November as residency is established at “Public Bench 1929″ thus providing Wall Street with the much needed good news to sustain positive numbers for an entire week.  By the way, what are the taxes on a 6x4x2 bench in the middle of Cleveland?

This ruling is BOGUS!!!!  Park benches,sidewalks and heating grates are not viable locations to take up a residence.  As sad as the homeless situation may be Barack Obama has yet to take one ” locationally disabled” person into his home and Joe Biden only gave .2% ($398) of his salary to charity last year.  So how much do they care about these people? 

This is about votes and the Democrats feeling that they are OWED an election because of 2000.  But where was the popular vote argument in their primary?  This is about votes and the Democrats feeling that they must be the first party to put a black man in the White House to make their party platforms of inclusion viable again. 

Well, all I can say is–see you in Ohio on election day.  I’ll be the “homeless man” on the bench at the mall.

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