Monkeys upset when trees removed from zoos

It’s sad I have to say this but…….For all those who might take this as news—THIS IS NOT REAL—-YET!!@!!!!!!!!

The fallout from the Carpentersville woman’s comments about monkeys has reached the nation’s zoos.  As of next year, trees will no longer be allowed in public viewing areas where monkeys are housed.  The move is an effort supported by everyone, everywhere,  not to offend anyone, at any time, for any reason, in any place.  The directors of the nation’s zoos feel it will help heal race relations in this country.  Monkeys feel the move is stupid and began throwing poo at the caretakers who began removing trees. 

This move by the zoos was sparked after a recent statement by a Hispanic woman, Linda Ramirez-Sliwinski.  When children were playing in a tree near her home she feared for their safety.  When she called out to tell the children to stop playing in the tree like monkeys,  a neighbor was offended and called the cops.  The neighbor felt it was racist because the children were African-American.  Linda was fined $75 for “disorderly conduct” for her statement.  Linda also was forced, by the Obama campaign,  to step down as a delegate because her comments were divisive. 

Monkeys everywhere have tried to argue that they have been climbing trees for thousands of years and that climbing is a natural inbred talent, and needed for survival.  When faced with a tough decision, the monkeys commented, they flee into the trees and throw poo, they can’t help it.  They also said that if children imitate them they should be careful as they do not have the inbred ability of a monkey and they could seriously get hurt.  They further went on to urge adults to keep a watchful eye on children in trees.  The zoo officials, after hearing the monkey’s arguments for trees,  said that as long as something can be misconstrued and used in any sort of demeaning, racial or otherwise offensive manner, by anyone, anywhere,  it would now have to be considered divisive.   

As zoos move forward with plans to remove the trees, they are also considering the names of some monkeys.  On the table are pygmy monkeys (considered offensive for small people), squirrel monkeys( considered offensive by squirrels), and even the beloved Curious George is under review ( Zoo officials would like to know what he is so curious about).  Sen Clinton has also identified Titis monkeys as a possible offense to her gender and Sen McCain would like a review of all “Old World Monkeys”  because they may be offensive to baby boomers and older Americans.  In related offenses, the Chinese Zodiac is under fire because someone was told they were born a “pig” while eating dinner at a Chinese restaurant somewhere in America.  More on that later. 

 

THIS IS REAL—————————————————–>

On the one hand I can understand the “divisiveness” of this comment.  I understand how the word was used 50 years ago in common speech. But please!!!

Is Obama above race or not?  Is he black or not?  Have we come a long way in race relations or not? Will we form a “more perfect Union” as his speech said by arguing over this lady’s comments which were nothing more than benign speech spoken everyday to all children of all colors in every language??????  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP CREATING RACISM WHERE NONE EXISTS.  THIS IS A PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN WITH REAL ISSUES, START ADDRESSING THEM IN REAL WORDS NOT NICE FEELGOOD BUZZWORDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.suntimes.com/news/politics/obama/883120,CST-NWS-trustee08.article#  for the real article about the “racial” incident

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